I started working at a 12 Step facility 32 years ago – trying to heal the world. I soon discovered that the approach wasn’t working. Too many clients were relapsing and returning to our facility, all saying they were going to do the program better this time. Was it them or was it the program?

In graduate school, suddenly I was exposed to something different, more, “in the trenches,” where you didn’t rely on a Sponsor, some Higher Power, a slogan, or 90 meetings in 90 days to fix you. Instead, it treatment focused on your creating a working relationship with yourself – well actually a working relationship with the younger part of you that got hurt. God (or your Higher Power) was looked upon differently. Not as some force that brought you back to sanity but a force that met you at your point of action.

32 years later, I used the approach to run a residential treatment facility and now an outpatient clinic. I look at the 12 Steps as such a powerhouse in the industry with incredible potential, but in need of a face lift. You need to understand that the 12 Step approach was created in the 1930s, and even Walt Disney knew Disneyland had to constantly upgrade and stay current with the times. In the 1930s the 12 Steps were state of the art and a sign of the times. That society has changed, and today we have AI technology, breakthroughs in mental illness and substance treatment. What if that technology was incorporated into AA? It could have a drastic impact around the world!

I wanted to kick around in this article the 12 Steps of Spiritual Psychology. This approach has helped me see success at the first Mental Health Urgent Care, at a luxury facility in Malibu, and in my own practice. Spiritual Psychology consists of 10 Psychological approaches, including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Gestalt Therapy, and Behavioral Therapy (which is what the 12 Steps are founded on). I’ve seen what works and what doesn’t work, but how do you change an icon that has never changed since the 1940s?

Let’s have some fun and jot down the 12 Steps of Spiritual Psychology.

1. Center yourself in your loving heart.

Love heals. It is the most powerful force in the universe. It creates life. It creates the life of your relationships. When we are centered in our loving heart and communicating from that place, we listen, we hear, we share kind words and focus on love, joy, and the beauty of life. This is opposed to judgment, anger, and defecation. The later brings war and hate. Love builds upon love.

2. Set clear and positive Intentions

What is your goal? Without a proper destination, we will just wander around in circles. Setting a clear intention points us in the right direction and begins the healing journey. For example: “My intention is to be in my loving heart.”

3. Address an issue physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

We are multifaceted. If we focus only on one dimension, it will put the rest of us out of balance. Many people in recovery only focus on sobriety. Sobriety is physical. We are so much more. Sobriety doesn’t make problems go away. We have a belief system. There are emotions. There are rules to follow – “You must have less that 15 items in the quick check out line.” If others violate that rule, we get upset. What if we only made that rule for ourselves? Wouldn’t it lead to more peace? Our rules need to be only for us – since we cannot control others. Taking the attachment to being right and making them wrong can create more inner harmony.

4. If you want to heal it – put it in the chair.

Gestalt Therapy uses an empty chair to purge out stuck feelings. If you are angry with mom, place an empty chair in front of you and imagine she sitting there. Tell her everything you feel. Next, switch chairs and allow mom to talk back to you. This type of work is incredible because there are many things we would never say to a person but now can. The withholding damages us and has a way of leaking out. Also, this work allows us to see an issue from another angle – to get the full picture.

5. Self-Forgiveness

Forgiveness of self helps us release a label we place on ourself or others. “I am an idiot!” Let it go with self-forgiveness. “I forgive myself for judging myself as an idiot and the truth is I am smart.” Or, “I forgive myself for judging mom as a bitch, and the truth is she was doing the best she knew.” Throw out the negativity and replace it with positive.

6. Ride an issue back to its core

Spiritual Psychology focuses on our emotional development. Most of our issues come from our developing years and can taint how we view the world. If someone abused you when you were growing up, your remaining years may be devoted to keeping yourself safe. Your current reactions have ancient roots. If you ride that feeling back to the root, and apply love to that wound, everything similar in your life will heal. Do we heal? Absolutely – and profoundly! “When love is applied to hurt – we heal.”

7. Own Projections