News and Insights

Identity issues are common with people coming in for treatment. For so long they’ve changed themselves in order to survive. If you find yourself always caring for others and making their wishes more important than yours, it is time to take an honest look at this. Genetically speaking, we are all the same. Nobody is above or below another, but why do you belittle yourself and cater to those,...

A common theme this week has been people trying to discover their own identity. Who am I? Why am I alive? Is there some special purpose for me? Or, am I destined to struggle day in and day out, simply exist, and then die? What is the point? Is there a reason that we are all alive? Deeper thoughts on this post than most. The big question is – do we even have time to ponder why we are even...

When I was in graduate school, we were asked to write a Master’s Thesis on any subject we desired and I chose Rock Band. Actually, my paper was written on the psychological aspects of creating and performing in a rock and roll band. To be honest, I had the time of my life! I never knew that school could be so much fun! I was born with the gift of music and love playing the guitar and...

With Spiritual Psychology, we see healing as the application of love to hurt. There is an art form to this and it can take on many strategies. Claims of healing have been frowned upon in this industry since many of the top approaches showed improvements in people, but not the true ultimate healing. For example, with Gestalt Therapy, Fritz Perls believed that when people saw many angles of a...

Psychology is the science of relationships. Our relationships with ourselves mirror our relationships with others. Therefore, it is extremely important for us to have a good relationship within. To do so becomes quite an art form – from repeating positive affirmations, using self-appreciation, to setting intentions to be more positive can set you on the proper path to being more kind to...

If you want to become a counselor, there are a few tidbits of information I can pass along that I’ve gathered in the last 30 years of fieldwork: Practice good self-care. Continue to work on your personal issues as they present themselves. Never work harder than the client. It is okay to let there be silence in the session as the client searches their mind. This process is the foundation of...

We had a common theme this past week at Basic Steps Mental Health and that was with loss. The subject of loss has many facets. There is loss of life, loss of a relationship, loss of health, and loss of purpose – as with retirement – to name a few. When we go through an abrupt change it can be startling. There is the classic Kubler-Ross stages of grief that can be used as a guide, in which I...

According to the Family Systems Theory, your current relationships are influenced by your family of origin. If you have problems with communication, and closeness, or get frustrated easily, take a look back and see how your family acted while you were growing up. To make a profound change, Family Systems Theory believes that the family system itself needs to change.  We all are born into...

This past week marked the passing of one of my best friend’s father, and the wife of another dear friend. Both of these people loved life, loved people, and were active in the community. The biggest part of being a therapist is keeping yourself in balance. In doing so, you are able to be there for others, unfortunately, both of the deaths hit me hard and I found myself counseling myself as I...

I learned a long time ago that when I compare myself to other people I always lose. My mother used to say, “The grass is always greener on the other side.” I think the reason why I made comparisons was in having low self-worth. We always assume that people are perfect and better, and we make ourselves second best – but that is just my theory. The real issue here is not the comparisons but...