What is an Addiction?

What is an addiction? An addiction is something that you are compelled to do and find it almost impossible to stop. I know this isn’t the clinical definition, but simply put this explains it. Not all addictions are bad. Addiction to exercise, a healthy diet, personal growth work, education, and helping out humanity are positive addictions. At the extreme, as in most things, even the great things can cause a problem.  

I’ll go out on a limb and state that each person has an addiction. I have an addiction to March Madness and of course my L.A. Dodgers, watching or attending each game. This has gotten almost out of hand, as of recently and my family considered doing an intervention on me.

All kidding aside, when any kind of addiction becomes out of hand what should a person do? If their heart isn’t into the change, no tool or approach will help. If there is that motivation to change, this is where the magic takes place.

Seeking Professional Help

Seeking out professional help is incredibly important. If we search out a friend or loved one to help us out, they can only help to the level of their life experience. What if they have no experience? Without the motivation to change, then it is natural for a person to try to make the change, fail, get frustrated, get more advice, try that, and fail again, feeling more and more hopeless. In AA they believe you will continue to do the addiction until you hit rock bottom, thereby getting the motivation to change. This depends on the severity of the bottom however and as a therapist, I have seen people whose bottom is death which is why inpatient care for people who have such low bottoms they would literally die if somebody doesn’t step in.

To take the mystery out of treatment, here are the general protocols of this program:

The therapists will make a diagnosis of how you are doing physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. This is accomplished through an interview where we fill out an ASAM form that asks a person questions in each of these areas. Next, a treatment plan is devised by the client and therapist about what the client wants to get out of treatment. Just so you know, treatment isn’t only about stopping the addiction (the physical behavior), but it also entails dealing with your thoughts, your feelings, and the direction you want to go in life. Without the addiction, then what? That question helps you move away from habitual behavior and into new realms in your life. How exciting is that?

Then the therapy begins and the exploration is on regarding why a person is compelled to repeat the addiction, or what we say – the limiting behavior. There is a lot of dynamics underneath the surface that needs to be processed through in order to change. If you only treat the addiction, underlying issues generally come to the surface causing a lot of upset and negativity and relapse is a certainty.

What is important in therapy is creating a trusting bond with the therapist. Shopping for the best fit is so important. You know when you meet somebody who gives you the willies. Avoid trying to make this relationship work. If you don’t feel comfortable with the therapist or the staff then listen to your gut. Successful treatment starts with feeling safe enough to be vulnerable. In establishing trust, people are amazed about what bubbles up from inside of them, and clearing out this unfinished business is the key to healing.

Unhealthy addictions impair your work, social, or other responsibilities. If the addiction is more important than taking care of your own physical needs, then therapy is essential. The habit won’t go away on its own. If fun or sugar or whatever is more important than your life, it is time to take an honest look at that. Screen addiction is on the rise. This is where video games are more important than work.

What is your addiction? Is it good or bad? If it is bad, would you be willing to make a change?

Look at that statement. “Would you be willing?” Just because you showed up for treatment doesn’t mean that you will change. Some people waste hundreds of thousands of dollars in treatment because they have an addiction to treatment itself. This is especially true in the luxury treatment facilities in Malibu, for example. I used to work at one of them where people were fed gourmet food, driven on outings, and if they broke the rules, there were no consequences. They were put in luxury and catered to. Then what was so bad about relapse?

Types of Addiction Treatment

There are many ways to treat an addiction. The Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) approach treats inner aspects of your personality that takes over and runs the show. These aspects include: The addict aspect, righteousness, being in control, being judgmental, and even self-sabotage. Instead of letting these aspects take control over you, you learn how to be in control of the aspect.  

Another way to treat this is through the Child–Adult–Parent Paradigm. Which part of your personality is running the show? If your child self is, then life is all about pleasure where drinking, food binging, sweets, sex, gaming, etc. becomes paramount. Learning how to be more adult and parenting the child aspect of your personality becomes the key.  

We practice Spiritual Psychology, which looks at problems as a blessing. When you solve a problem, you grow in consciousness. Repeating problems are the big focus in this treatment because if you don’t solve the problem, it keeps on returning. How many times do you want to go through the same issue? How many lifetimes? This soul-centered approach is new, innovative, and gives real meaning to working past problems.

When you have an addictive habit that you just can’t shake it is important to focus, not on stopping the addiction, but focusing on what you would do without the addiction. When you focus on not using, the subconscious mind doesn’t hear the word “not” and hears – in this case – “using”. Okay, so if you weren’t using, what would you be doing? 

On the brain level, our brain wires itself to support repeated habits and the behavior becomes automatic. Doing the opposite of the habit changes the wiring, but this takes effort and repetition to establish a new, more healthy habit (wiring).

In the top 50 approaches to treatment, shock therapy is up in the top 20! Yep. People get an electric charge that is paired with using a substance and the odds are high that people stop the habit. Stopping the addiction is the first step, remaining sober still entails addressing the underlying thoughts and emotions that drive the addiction.

Group therapy is in the top ten because of the social support. It is difficult getting sober on your own and a group tends to push each other. What is great about group therapy is knowing that someone else has your back. Behavioral therapy is founded on the belief that doing the right behavior over and over again will stick. Behaviors paired with a reward are often repeated. This is what Dr. Phil and Tony Robbins advocate, as well as the 12 Step approach. Unfortunately, the success rates are low with this approach if not combined with other methods.

Spiritual Psychology

What we advocate in the Spiritual Psychology approach is the importance of befriending yourself. Even if you are in your addiction, continue to smoke cigarettes, or eat sugar, bashing yourself doesn’t help you. You can’t find the Light through the darkness. Instead, befriend yourself with each puff and every swallow. When you choose to honor the amazing you under the surface, it is easier to finally let go of that nasty habit.

A final word of caution. If you are entrenched in a gripping physical addiction to for example alcohol or heroin if you suddenly stop you will risk having a toxic detox and risk death. If this describes you please seek medical help. This isn’t anything to play with. Once this substance is out of your system, it is important to put in medication that is a deterrent to using, which eases the cravings. Then it is time to undergo therapy. This new physical change needs to be supported mentally and emotionally, especially by a group.  

Now in my 28^th year of sobriety, all I can say is that I am fortunate. Many of my using buddies didn’t fare so well. I believe that those people who were there, that got out of it, are the best teachers. You can only imagine how grateful I am that I can assist others on their healing journey. I am not saying that I am addiction-free. I still love fast food, binging on television shows, and sports. I try to get in my 10,000 steps in a day (but recently have fallen short). But above all my addiction to the Los Angeles Dodgers – sorry Mariners fans can find me clearing my work schedule and rushing to T-Mobile park like I did this past week. The ultimate would be, of course, Seattle and L.A. in the World Series. So keep up the great work Mariners, at least you have a Seager on your team.  

Compassionate Care is Always Available

There are many more tools and strategies you can use in your pursuit of happiness. Here is where we come in. Contact us at Basic Steps Mental Health and let us support and educate you on this journey back to your loving heart center. Imagine living a heart-centered life, regardless of what is happening externally. We’d love to be of help.

For 25 years, Dr. Scott Alpert, the clinical director of Basic Steps Mental Health, has treated over 7,000 people with mental health and addiction problems, using a Psychological approach that mixes and matches ten of the top approaches used in the industry.  We are here virtually and in-person to help you get through this COVID-19 pandemic and many other difficulties you may be experiencing.

May you have good mental health.