When I was in graduate school, we were asked to write a Master’s Thesis on any subject we desired and I chose Rock Band. Actually, my paper was written on the psychological aspects of creating and performing in a rock and roll band. To be honest, I had the time of my life! I never knew that school could be so much fun!

I was born with the gift of music and love playing the guitar and singing, so I took that moment to showcase my talents to the student body. Hey, I was attracted to a special woman and that endeavor got me a fiancé! Throughout the years I had performed and the pinnacle was performing in a musical comedy group at the top comedy establishments in Hollywood for a number of years!

I thought those days were behind me as I refocused my life’s journey to helping people as a counselor, but, recently a miracle took place in which the musical career I thought I had shelved came roaring to life!

I met up with a person from the comedy group at a picnic who I later found out was a music producer in the industry. He took a liking to the new songs I had composed and asked if he could produce my songs.

Was I dreaming? As a child, I wanted to be Paul McCartney and play in the Beatles, so I begged my parents to buy me a guitar and at the age of 12, they gave in. I literally spent hours creating blisters on my fingertips and composed classics like: “My Woman Be Ugly”, “Goodbye Planet Earth”, and the cult classic “So Close, and Yet So Far Away.” Shoot, I thought I’d have some mention in the Musical Comedy Hall of Fame, with my composition of “The Stray Trout Strut,” but sadly there isn’t one.

With my dream reawakened, and a new Pro Logic system on my computer, I have taken to recording like a fish in water. (Sorry, that’s the best I could do right off the cuff). Has this been easy? No. All of my insecurities have rushed to the surface, and I’ve found myself needing to use the tools on myself that I use on my clients.

As my professional career in mental health has blossomed, I have had limited time to do much of anything else. Though, with the constant prodding of my friend for my material, at first I was in denial. I kept thinking to myself that he couldn’t be serious, so I sluffed it off and made excuses like he was just being kind. However when he started to push for the recordings, my old dream came rushing to the surface!

Throughout the recording process, I’ve had so many emotions hit me at once that I needed to turn to the tools that helped heal me, back in the day, and suddenly realized that I had a lot of unresolved issues still inside of me that I needed to address. Low self-worth seemed to top the list. I wasn’t a musician. Shoot, it had been years since I picked up my guitar and actually played. Was I young enough? Could I afford to do this and take breaks from my real job? I am a therapist, for God’s sake, not a musician. But, through all my own inner work it hit me – deep down I am a musician and the songs that I sent to my friend from day one, have all been met with praise!

In graduate school, there was a slogan: “The real issue is not your issue, the real issue is how you relate to yourself while you go through your issue.” This one phrase took on its own life as I processed my doubts through free-form writing, using opposite handwriting, and taking one more step forward when I wanted to stop. As the recording process has gone on, I’ve been having incredible performances in my spare bedroom, to an audience that is unseen. Hey, don’t judge me, I’m entitled to my fantasies. In fact, visualization is the best method of manifesting what you want in your life. I created this business through visualizations, and visualizations have helped me in relationships, selling my condo, and now my Ideal Music Scene! Who cares if my voice makes me cringe when I hear a track played back or miss a string on a lead? All I know is that in my fantasies I was born to do this! Watch out, Sir Paul.

You would think that this Doctor of Clinical Psychology wouldn’t have any issues at all, given I own and operate a mental health clinic, but seriously I am a human being with my own issues and worries. Thank God I have the tools of the trade at my disposal, but perfect? No, I am far from it.  

What has stood out in this process is that my attitude is everything! If I have low energy, it is time to shut things down. When I am happy, then the records have turned out great! The old comedy songs have been replaced with psychological tunes – which are dear to my heart. In one song, a guy is pulled over for a DUI and complains about the process he must comply with. Another song depicts a conversation the same guy has while he undergoes mandatory treatment, with his younger self. Another song, “Projections” refers to a Sigmund Freud concept that we are all mirrors of each other. Psychological Rock? You bet it is, and I have to admit that I rock!  

As I write this article, I am glowing. I’ve been facing my fears one by one, allowing myself to occasionally freak out about singing in front of a large audience or being televised live. “Now, coming up to our stage… Dr. Scott!” Hey, this is my head and I decide what goes on in it!

Ultimately, I would love to put on a performance in this area, where clients can attend and enjoy seeing their counselor squirm up on stage. Well, deflect that. What I really mean is that the clients will enjoy my songs, sing along, and laugh at the appropriate spots – like what happens in my fantasies.

I remember years ago being freaked out about a kayaking trip I was planning with a coworker. He wanted to kayak to a nearby island, so we started to train for kayaking from Ventura Harbor to Annacappa Island – about 12 miles in total. Unfortunately, a week before the trip this coworker canceled, but staying true to my own commitment, I went anyway. I was fortunate enough at the time to have a friend shadowing me in his sailboat. Before this I created an Ideal Kayaking Scene, mapping out what I wanted to take place, and on the day of the paddle, an adventure took place that exceeded all expectations! Out, in the middle of the ocean, I was joined by a pod of dolphins who protected me on all sides for miles! Plus, the ocean was flat that day, in an area known to have high seas and wind! Visualization is magical and I highly encourage you to give it a try.

The latest news: Up to this point, I have produced 8 of 15 songs, and sent these to my friend who asked me to come down to Los Angeles and take part in the final production of the music. He hasn’t told me any of these works of art suck, so I will take this as a good sign. Wouldn’t it be awesome for me to turn on the radio and hear one of my songs playing? I think it will be Running Running, where a guy relapses, loses his job and home, and is back on the street. Yeah, I’ve been there and used psychology to get me back on my own two feet.  

I hope you have enjoyed this post. I’ll need to create a fan page so I can inform people of my upcoming tour dates around the world. Did you read this Joseph? You may have another website to create for me in the near future.