What if all the problems you were facing were meant to be? What if there was a higher purpose to your life, instead of being here to eat, shit, and die. Because life didn’t make sense to me, and having no religious beliefs, I went on a quest in 1978 to find some meaning in life. If life was just a death sentence, well, that was too much for me to bear.

What if’s are born out of having no evidence and being stuck in speculation. I wanted to talk about life, about death, but my friends and family backed away from the subject. Talking about it made our impending death more real. So with the help of a close friend, I began to walk the road less traveled.

It must seem bleak reading this, but I have asked clients what they feared the most. In 30 years of counseling, only a handful of people let down their guard and confessed that they mostly feared death.

Without beliefs, we are in this existential crisis. It turned out that I chose the right university because we did a great bit of studying on life and death. The slogan at the university was – we are spiritual beings having a human experience. Meaning that our soul is always and this body is simply rented.

Spirituality is the belief in a universal force that created life, supports us, and there is a purpose for us being here. Learning how to work with this force can be mastered if we choose to walk that sacred path.

My initial education on spirituality took place a decade ago when a friend asked if I knew how to meditate. I didn’t at the time, so he asked if he could show me. Open-minded, I said yes, mimicked his body position, and began to sit there and wait for some cosmic presence to take me over. Well, all that did was have me judge myself as not doing this right, all my flaws came into my mind and the whole situation just became a bust. Frustrated I asked my friend what he did when he was meditating and he told me he imagined that Christ was above him, shining his light down to him. Well, being Jewish, I didn’t have any beliefs at all, but again was open-minded, so I once again struck up the pose and began to sit there believing Jesus was above me. In a flash, all these questions that I had throughout the day were answered. I was amazed and when I opened my eyes, my friend was sitting there grinning at me. He obviously felt my excitement.

Okay, with the possibility of there being a Jesus, my friend and I began to meditate daily and I began to get comfortable with “Transcendental Meditation.”

Another friend’s mother asked if I would like to rent out her house. It had been on the market for a few years, nobody wanted to buy it. She tried renting it out but people chose for some reason to leave rather quickly for no reason. The rent was dirt cheap so I got my meditation friend and a few others to move in with me. On the first day I moved in, I discovered the place was haunted. Yep. All sorts of things happened and for the full accounting of it check out the book “The Burnward” by yours truly and read about the mayhem that went on there.

What happened at that house showed me that there was a dimension in life that was very active and yet unseen. Fascinated I rushed to church, converted to Christianity, and rushed to a school on spirituality because maybe they could teach me more about the paranormal experiences that continually took place while I lived there. One thing was for sure – I was not only open-minded, but now I was eager to find out the explanations of everything that took place at that house and about life itself.

At the University of Santa Monica, in a nutshell, I learned that the problems that we continually have to deal with are why we are alive. If we process through them properly, that problem is not only solved, but we also grow at the level of our soul. Carl Rogers, famous for his encounter groups in the 1960s foretold of a psychology whose aim was tending to the soul – spiritual psychology is that approach. Now how we process through the recurring problems is an art form and we were taught 10 psychological approaches in which to process through a problem on the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual levels. If we avoid one of the levels, well, the problem not only remains but gets more intense. What recurring problems do you have? Have you noticed them getting more severe?

I personally liked realizing that there was a purpose for the issues that I had at the time. No, they all haven’t been solved, but I can honestly say that I rarely have panic attacks, can sleep throughout the night, and wake up each morning happy and ready to take on the day. This awaits you after you learn how to process through the stubborn problems from your past or even present. And how is this done? Physically taking better care of yourself, mentally having more positive than negative thoughts, emotionally applying love to the younger part inside of you that went through difficulty, and spiritually forgiving yourself for your past mistakes. If it seems overwhelming to do so, well think again. It is your life and the problems don’t go away on their own. And no, a power greater than yourself isn’t going to return you to sanity, that is your job and as you take your action steps, God is with you.

With spiritual psychology, the real issue is how you are with yourself. And to be honest, the issue is how you are with yourself as you go through your issue. It can be easy when everything is going great, but how are you with yourself when the shit is hitting the fan?

To me, spiritual psychology is the psychology of love. No, there isn’t any shame involved because you’ve already shamed yourself enough. It is getting into the trenches with the younger part inside of you that went through difficulty, listening, talking to, and even playing with the younger you. It may sound crazy, but I guess when you get right down to it – emotional work has a language all of its own and it is not logical – it is dedicated to you feeling good and you can’t make yourself think that way, emotionally you’ve got to feel it.

Is it easy? Once you’ve mastered the approach it can be. At first, it feels like you are walking through mud but no pain, no gain. The ancient wounds that are dealt with can be troublesome – that is true but after a few attempts you can easily master the approach. In fact, we teach the self-counseling method where on paper you actually counsel yourself.

10 psychological approaches, love applied to hurt, learning the professional tools to literally counsel yourself, and this is just the bare bones. The book, “Self Helping,” by yours truly gives a great description of the approach and provides exercises to do in order to get an understanding of the approach and philosophy.