Getting Socially Healthy
In Graduate School we were taught to take care of our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual needs simultaneously in order for the change to stick. If we only focused on improving ourselves physically, for example, weight loss, then it will also impact the underlying mental and emotional levels causing us to be unstable and usually, we’d slide back into the same physical condition. This is...Learn More
Violence in the Community
Coming from Los Angeles, we knew that when the weather got hot, the violence increased. In this area, it seems like the heat has the same effect. At my housing complex, we have had a sudden increase in violence that has unnerved a lot of people, including myself. What can a person do about it? There are a few psychological models that are perfect to turn to when violence is taking place. As...Learn More
Why Can’t I Just Fix This On My Own?
The answer to the question above is you can, given the know-how. When I graduated from High School, I was depressed, anxious, and didn’t know a thing about life. I did pretty well in school, with what was taught there, but nobody taught me about what was really important – how to keep myself emotionally stable. At that time, my family didn’t deal with my emotions. If you acted out you were...Learn More
Crisis Management
A crisis takes place when problems are too much for you to handle. Often people experience panic attacks at this time where the heart races, you feel short of breath, and think you will faint. There are a special set of tools you can use at this time to calm yourself down. At times of crisis, our brains don’t have access to logical thought so please keep things simple. Here are the top ten...Learn More
Getting Out of the Shadows
When I write mental health articles, I try to stay as neutral as possible. For therapists, we treat people that often have opposing viewpoints to our own, and for me personally, I learn so much from the other person’s point of view, which makes each day rich and an opportunity to search my own self for my rationale in taking certain positions. Often, I post the first draft of something I’ve...Learn More
Teaching the Old Dog New Tricks
When I was in graduate school, they asked us to create our own theory of healing. With 200 plus students, you can only imagine the responses. I didn’t take it seriously, wanted to be my silly self and took in my life-sized stuffed bear as a prop. Luckily my fellow students were kind as I sang out The Bear Necessities of Healing. Twenty-some odd years later I have thought in depth about this...Learn More
Valentine’s Day – A Make it or Break it?
Did this past Valentine’s day make or break your relationship? This is a pivotal day for people in relationships because you will discover the actual state the partnership is in. If problems exist, they won’t go away on their own, work needs to be done and not on your partner but on you. This is because the health of your relationship reflects the relationship you have with yourself. If you...Learn More
Is Your Family of Origin Sick?
According to Object Relations Therapy, all mental illness has its roots in early childhood experiences. If your family was dysfunctional, there are great odds that this was passed down to you. Do your relationships mirror the relationship your parents had? Do you fight? Do you avoid any confrontations? Is it important for you to be right? Do you have to be in control? Are you always...Learn More
Are you Addicted to Being Right?
Are you addicted to being right? Is it important for you to win? It is important to understand that when one person is right or wins, another person is wrong and loses. Having to be right and win all of the time is the downfall of meaningful relationships. We refer to these as Transactional relationships. In Transactional relationships failure is eminent. Transactional Relationships For many...Learn More