How to Change Others
So you want to learn how to change other people, but why? If they change to how you want them to be, would that make you feel better? If they said I’m sorry, would it make your problems go away? So many go to great lengths to change others, to make them love you, respect you, or simply to stop bothering you. I have some bad news for you – you can’t change them, that is their job. Many people...Learn More
A Quick Go-To
A friend of mine is a dentist and hired an organization to help him improve the systems in his practice. His company literally exploded overnight and I got him to share a few of the principles with me. One of the concepts was called the Tone Scale. It referred to the emotional tones people will have in their lives. From apathy to elation and all in between, this company helped him work with...Learn More
How to Spark Motivation
How to get ourselves in motion can be difficult, if you’ve been used to leading a lethargic lifestyle. Simply getting up from the couch and washing the dishes may feel agonizing, when the habit has been watching T.V. or playing a video game. This was the topic of the group this past week. How do you get your butt in motion when the habit seems sometimes too difficult to break? My question is,...Learn More
A Client Returns
A client I had seen five years ago came in for a court assessment. The case was pending since that time and this report was to bring it to a close. One thing for certain was the person had completely changed. As a therapist, you treat people, let them go, and in my case rarely see them again. If they return or call and say hi, it is a bonus. The key is to not get attached to the outcomes of...Learn More
A Tribute – Thank You for My Tears
I often call myself a dinosaur because I grew up in a different era where the social norms were much different. As a child, we only had a handful of television stations that came in fuzzy most of the time. Often I turned to the radio for entertainment and especially to listen to sporting events. You have to understand that we didn’t have the luxury of seeing every sporting event like they do...Learn More
The Law of Attraction
Do these statements look familiar? “When you’re down people kick you.” – Well, what happens when you are up? “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” – Well, why can’t we think of the best things? It is interesting how we have been trained to focus on the negatives. In our lives, this is how we create the negative things. It is called: The Law of Attraction. Why don’t we instead...Learn More
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Choosing a treatment program that meets your needs is an important decision to make. Our policy has always been to be ourselves, present our information, and let a person decide. Whether people decide to stay or go, we too are assessing if they meet our standards. As for our groups, we want to make sure that people don’t have a psychotic disorder and can reason. It can disrupt a group if...Learn More
Developmental Psychology
When I started in the field as a counselor, my supervisor Marie preached about understanding where a person was developmentally. Working with the learning disabled you’d see an adult and then realize they operated as a child. Up to this point, I understood that early childhood trauma caused mental illness later in life. It was in our early years we tried to create a strong sense of self. If...Learn More
My Fondest Counseling Memory
28 years as a counselor has had its ups and downs. There were scary times at the Mental Health Urgent Care when people who were psychotic got unruly. How can you convince somebody who feels you are in on the government plot against them that you are there to help? Somehow, I managed to do so. Though, I wondered this morning what was my fondest memory. I’ve had a lot of incredible memories. In...Learn More