Changing for the Better
This article should be entitled personal responsibility since in changing ourselves, it has to be done by ourselves. So often people want to have others swoop in and rescue them because we feel it is their fault, they are making me feel this way, when the truth is, it is all about us. In taking personal responsibility, we are no longer victims of what others do or say. In all actuality, it is...Learn More
Rebuilding Self Worth
In 28 years, I’ve seen my fair share of broken people. Many of which I treated in an 11-year span at a Mental Health Urgent Care where I saw over 7,000 people! Across the country, 20% of the people have a mental illness that warrants serious treatment. How many of these get treatment? Only a handful. One thing I learned is that we are all the same. To some extent we all suffer from something,...Learn More
Conscious Relationships
I guess if you’ve made all the mistakes in relationships, you would be a good guide for people that are struggling. Almost marrying four times, living with partners for years, and raising a child have given me an interesting perspective on couple’s therapy. I’ve learned that there are four major elements in making a relationship successful, or in my case – manageable. Communication – If...Learn More
The Year 2000 – Revisited
This was a very interesting week at Basic Steps Mental Health. With all of the talk about WWIII and nuclear war, I was reminded of the panic that hit everybody with the Y2K. If you weren’t old enough to remember what was going on back then, the main computers in charge of all the critical systems in the country were not equipped to switch to the year 2000. Fearing nuclear meltdown at the time,...Learn More
Book Writing 101
Okay, I admit it. I am an addict. Addicted to writing. In a recent intervention from family and friends, I had to admit that I was powerless over the pen. Writing has some deep roots with me. Ever since I was a teenager I lived across the street from Ray Bradbury, the science fiction writer. From this moment I was stung with the writing bug. Yeah, that’s right, I’ll blame my addiction on him....Learn More
How Is Your Inner Child Doing?
The approach that had the greatest impact on me was Reparenting work, where you actually become the new mom and dad to your wounded self. When I was a child, it wasn’t much fun, especially when my bully of a father came home. At that moment playtime and peace were over and you prayed he wouldn’t take your head off. According to Object Relations Therapy, mental illness has its roots in early...Learn More
I Am Sorry
My father, who recently died, came to me in a dream last night. All he repeated was, “I am sorry.” I miss my father. He suffered from depression for the last few years of his life. At 91 he had a lengthy and mostly happy life until his vision and hearing went. “I am sorry” was hard to stomach. It reminded me of how I was trained to punish myself when I did something wrong. As a child, I had...Learn More
How Do We Heal?
How do we heal? What an interesting topic. Do you know? I have devoted my life to showing people how to, in the way I was trained to do so in school, but is that the only way? If you are looking for treatment the first question to ask a potential therapist is what is their theory on healing. Healing. Do people really heal? A coworker asked me that the first week I was working at a luxury...Learn More
Full Circle
This week was my father’s 90th birthday. He and I had been on quite a journey together. At first, things were horrible. I later found out that he was going through a horrible marriage, realized that his wife was interested in another man, and didn’t know what to do with his feelings. He broke things, furniture, walls, and almost me in the process. A month later he was gone. What does a young...Learn More