Why Are We Here?
Our eyes open, there are people peering at us, and all we can do is look back. We are a helpless child trying to make sense of the world upon our birth. Not able to think, all a baby can do is observe, but as we grow, our brain wires, and suddenly we have the ability for complex thinking. Then comes the universal questions: Where did life come from? Why are we here? What happens after we die?
I chose to study Spiritual Psychology to find the answers to these questions in particular. They didn’t teach us anything about the meaning of life in school, and my family and friends never wanted to talk about these questions, but when my parents told me there was nothingness after you die, I began suffering panic attacks. My, did I hate waking up in the middle of the night pondering nothingness. My life soon became a living hell!
Without any spiritual beliefs, we suffer an “Existential Crisis.” This happens when it becomes all too real that life is a death sentence. Depicted so well in the movie about Andy Kaufman’s life – “Man on the Moon”. If you didn’t know Andy Kaufman, he was a comedian known for his role on the T.V. show Taxi, and wrestling women for publicity. Jim Carey did an incredible job depicting the time when he was searching for a cure for his cancer, and traveled the world to find that magical something, only to realize the so-called experts were frauds and he was really going to die.
Why are we alive? Was this life caused by some bizarre cosmic event? The day I talked to a close friend about my fears, she told me that same belief in nothingness and I suffered my worst panic attack ever! Like normal 17-year-olds, when all else failed I turned to drugs.
I read about a priest during WWII who was so upset with the bombing raids above his church in Italy that he flew into the sky and tried to wave off the bombers. 30 pilots saw him standing on the clouds and documented it. Eventually this priest, so disgusted with the state of his country, simply ascended into heaven without leaving a trace. Now if I could do that, well, if we all could do this then what’s the problem? However, I am not a priest, I can’t walk on the clouds, nor walk on water, so basically, I guess I’m screwed.
My spiritual journey began the day a friend asked me if I ever meditated. When I told him no, he asked if I wanted to learn, and I said yes. I saw this as an opportunity to calm my rapidly beating heart. I remember mimicking his body posture, closing my eyes, and being hit with mayhem! All these thoughts I had been pondering throughout the day rushed into my head and I experienced sheer terror! Disgusted, I opened my eyes, only to find my friend smiling back at me.
“I can’t do this,” I told him. “How do you meditate?” He told me that he imagined Jesus was above him and feeding him light. Being Jewish, I had no belief in Jesus except for a holiday named after him where people gave each other gifts and decorated their homes. Being open-minded, I returned to my pose, imagined Jesus hovering above, and in moments all these questions I had were answered. “What the Hell?” I blurted out. My friend only chuckled.
I wanted more of a glimpse. Who was this Jesus? Was this the avenue I needed to take to finally experience peace? I think I was more confused than ever, but I was on a search for the meaning of life and hoped to find real proof that life wasn’t some random event.
On the day I unknowingly moved into a haunted house, things started to get more spicy. Before this, I thought ghosts and things moving on their own were just fantasies in movies. Seeing things, hearing things, and feeling things that weren’t there was a shock to my system. Okay, I’ll be honest – It scared the crap out of me. Did I move out? A normal person would, but like an idiot, I remained. Not having any spiritual beliefs I was exposed to Jesus and ghosts, and was spending my time meditating, while at the same time, I was using drugs, and meditating and using drugs with meditation. Did I mention that I was a drug addict? I thought drugs would give me that spiritual experience I was looking for but after a while, it only led me down a dangerous path that was nearly impossible to get out of. Normally, when the drugs stopped working, my friends and I would dry out for a few weeks to detox to become lightweights again, and then start back up. On one of these drying-out periods, a life-changing event took place.
DISCLAIMER: What follows was true – whether you believe it or not. More than one person was around when the following events took place so I can’t even negate it happened to myself. If you choose not to read a recounting of the following events, please close the page and read a more clinical article on our website. What is to follow is why I chose to study and practice Spiritual Psychology.
For those remaining – thank you and after reading this, if you have had paranormal experiences please drop us a line and let us know about it. Alright, enough with the waffling, let’s get cracking.
We learned that the darkness can’t come into the light so we worked hard at remaining upbeat and happy in the house, otherwise, we were more likely to experience an attack by the negative forces that were lurking around. So we kept up with our meditations, and as always, I strummed on my guitar and created silly songs. Then it happened. One night in the wee hours of the morning, I woke between dreams to find my body vibrating and paralyzed. I tried to cry out for help but only “ZZZZZZZ” came out of my mouth. The only thing I could do was move my eyes! I prayed to Jesus like I never had before and a voice in my head said, “Go back to sleep, I’ve got this covered.” So I relaxed, closed my eyes, and calmed myself, and suddenly that energy left.
“Whoa!” I sat up and shouted. At the same time my buddy, sleeping in the bottom bunk of our bunk bed shouted out “Whoa!” Yes, we were both grabbed by the same evil force at the same time! I reacted like most rational people did – I ran out of there and took up shop on the living room couch. I refused to sleep in that room for a week. But, soon I braved the elements and found myself climbing back onto my top bunk. Then came a dark day that was palpable. I mean you can feel something bad was in the air. The weird feeling of day turned to night and the eerie darkness made it the most eerie and silent night. When all the lights in the house went out, I left for my car. The look on my roommates’ faces didn’t have that normal festive look but one of doom then I knew I wasn’t the only one feeling it. My meditation friend was convinced we were going to see a sign from God that night and he kept telling me we were going to see a sign from God that evening.
“You may see a sign, but I’m going to see the inside of my eyelids,” I replied as I grabbed my bedding to sleep in my car. One thing was for sure – I didn’t want to get paralyzed again.
After hours of my friend pounding on my car, I gave in. He wanted my help in seeing a sign so I reluctantly obliged. Why did he always get me into these things, I wondered to myself. I began chanting with him in unison for God to show us a sign. “Show us a sign. Show us a sign.” We repeated this over and over again as we walked into the living room where only a few candles lit the area. We walked into the den while chanting and suddenly the lights went on, but it wasn’t from the lamp. It was from a man of pure white light who suddenly appeared and was smiling at us.
No. We were not on drugs. No, I am not trying to convince anybody to change religions or their faith. All I know is that we got what we asked for and were given an amazing gift of this Man of White Light. I will never forget him. All he did was beam joy! It was the happiest person I ever saw and it scared the crap out of me.
I sprinted to the church, went to bible study three times a week, and enrolled in the spiritual psychology school in hopes of someone explaining what I experienced – but of course, this was something unique.
“We are spiritual beings having a human experience,” was the slogan of the spiritual psychology school. According to the University of Santa Monica, all the problems we go through and solve, help our souls evolve. Life at the University was about problem-solving because if we didn’t process through our problems, they would keep returning over and over again.
There is educational value to all the problems we face. When a problem shows up, try to find out what is the meaning of it and work on growing from it. With this point of view, suddenly the shit that I was going through all had a purpose. Life suddenly wasn’t something to fear but embrace! So I dove into my personal healing, rubbed my nose into the darkness of my own past, and each time I processed through a problem I felt so much lighter. This soon became my new high – a natural one. Then it struck me. I wanted to be like the Man of White Light. Boy did I have a long way to go, but if the soul went on and on, why not start on this now?
Okay, this may sound freaky and people might think that the house and the drugs did a job on me, but learning about how malleable the brain is, plus it has been 40 years since I was abusing drugs, I think that I’ve tested my brain enough to now have a reputable reputation. Honestly, when two or more people are having the same delusion at the same time, the odds of that can’t be calculated. You do the math.
Why are we here? What happens when we die? The above is what I have come to know, but for you, you are just reading a recount of what some person went through. Now I hand this subject over to you. What I’ve learned is people need to discover things on their own, so the basics are meditation, no drugs, an open mind, and above all some research. The information is out there and I encourage you to check out the following books:
The Anatomy of the Spirit by Carolyn Myss
Dying to be Me by Anita Moorjani
The Five Invitations by Frank Ostaseski
The Seat of the Soul by Gary Zukav
Many Lives, Many Masters by Dr. Brian Weiss
Compassionate Care is Always Available
There are many more tools and strategies you can use in your pursuit of happiness. Here is where we come in. Contact us at Basic Steps Mental Health and let us support and educate you on this journey back to your loving heart center. Imagine living a heart-centered life, regardless of what is happening externally. We’d love to be of help.
For 25 years, Dr. Scott Alpert, the clinical director of Basic Steps Mental Health, has treated over 7,000 people with mental health and addiction problems, using a Psychological approach that mixes and matches ten of the top approaches used in the industry. We are here virtually and in-person to help you get through this COVID-19 pandemic and many other difficulties you may be experiencing.
May you have good mental health.
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