A Tribute – Thank You for My Tears

I often call myself a dinosaur because I grew up in a different era where the social norms were much different. As a child, we only had a handful of television stations that came in fuzzy most of the time. Often I turned to the radio for entertainment and especially to listen to sporting events. You have to understand that we didn’t have the luxury of seeing every sporting event like they do today, but we sure did listen to them. I think that was where I got interested in listening. I love my audiobooks, love listening to my clients talk about themselves, and really enjoy listening to baseball. That’s because I grew up listening to Vin Skully from the Los Angeles Dodgers for roughly 60 years! Sadly Vin passed away at 94 this month and I didn’t realize how much that would affect me.

Vin was like a secondary parent. He told stories of all the players, didn’t root for only our team but was very impartial, which is unlike what we have in the industry today. Broadcasters need to take a page out of his book, so to speak because this feeds the “us against them” mentality that is running rampant in this world today.

I wonder what I would say if I were to talk to Vin right now? Of course, I’d want to thank him for the years of entertaining myself and countless millions of people. Also note his compassion and care for all the people he interacted with, and how I was moved by his calls of the Hank Aaron homerun, his admiration of Willie Mays, who wasn’t on our team, and the little notes about players on both sides of the field. Lastly, I would want to thank him for his talks after 911 and when Covid hit, to simply calm us all down.

 

 

As I watched the tributes to his life and accomplishments, I saw how the Los Angeles Dodgers were trying to lay his memory to rest but wondered how I would do so. This was touching upon my own loss, with my stepfather’s passing almost a year ago. Both of these men had an incredible impact on me and as I grew older, I never considered them ever dying. My father had been such a great advisor and constant source of support, Vin in his storytelling and assurances also helped me through life’s difficulties but now both are gone.  

I guess it’s now up to me. As a therapist I know I have to feel my feelings and let these tears flow because pushing them down only leads to further depression. But I’m also realizing that the grief I feel is equivalent to the amount of love I had for them both. I’d rather have these tears, knowing that I had such a deep love for them.  

It’s interesting that as a therapist you are trained to have a clinical distance between you and your client, which I always thought was a bunch of bull… In counseling, it is two people connecting and working together on the difficulties a person experiences in their life. The distance thing just doesn’t seem appropriate. Of course, there are therapeutic boundaries and sexual intimacy things to avoid, but person-to-person sharing love through non-physical contact is what I believe is an incredible healing element.

It’s interesting writing out about sexuality because I normally don’t need to explain that, it is just a given. I love somebody too much to take it to that level. Though not crying in sessions? This just isn’t normal.

So Vin and dad thank you for my tears. Dad, your sayings are posted throughout all the handouts I give to my clients. Vin, your calm manner and reveling in telling a story continues as I bore my clients with tales of having to get up, turn the television channel and adjust the rabbit ears for better reception.

May you both find peace and Go Dodgers!

Compassionate Care is Always Available

There are many more tools and strategies you can use in your pursuit of happiness. Here is where we come in. Contact us at Basic Steps Mental Health and let us support and educate you on this journey back to your loving heart center. Imagine living a heart-centered life, regardless of what is happening externally. We’d love to be of help.

For 25 years, Dr. Scott Alpert, the clinical director of Basic Steps Mental Health, has treated over 7,000 people with mental health and addiction problems, using a Psychological approach that mixes and matches ten of the top approaches used in the industry. We are here virtually and in-person to help you get through this COVID-19 pandemic and many other difficulties you may be experiencing.

May you have good mental health.